Important notices
See HOME Page
See HOME Page
Interesting quotes from famous Jews
My father never lived to see his dream come true of an
all-Yiddish-speaking
Canada.
-David Steinberg
I once
wanted to become an atheist but I gave up. They have no
holidays.
-Henny Youngman
Look
at Jewish history. Unrelieved lamenting
would be intolerable. So, for every
ten Jews beating their breasts, God
designated one to be crazy and amuse the breast beaters. By the time I was five
I knew I was that one.
-Mel Brooks
The time
is at hand when the wearing of a prayer shawl
and skullcap will not bar a man from the
White House, unless, of course, the man
is Jewish.
-Jules Farber
Even
if you are Catholic, if you live in New York,
you're Jewish. If you live in Butte, Montana, you are
going to be a goy even if you
are Jewish.
-Lenny Bruce
The
remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served us nothing
but leftovers. The original meal has never been
found.
-Calvin Trillin
Let me
tell you the one thing I have against Moses. He took
us forty years into the desert in order to bring us to the one place in the
Middle East that has no
oil!
-Golda Meir
Even a secret
agent can't lie to
a Jewish mother.
-Peter Malkin
My
idea of an agreeable person is a person who agrees with
me.
-Benjamin Disraeli
It's so
simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don't say
it.
-Sam Levenson
Don't be humble; you are
not that great.
-Golda Meir
I
went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I had
lost exactly two
weeks.
-Joe E. Lewis
A
spoken contract isn't worth the paper it's written
on.
-Sam Goldwyn
I don't want to achieve
immortality through my work. I want to achieve immortality through not
dying.
-Woody Allen
Whoever called it
necking was a poor judge of
anatomy.
-Groucho Marx
A
politician is a man who will double cross that bridge when he comes to
it.
-Oscar Levant
Too bad that
all the people who know how to run this country are busy driving taxis and
cutting hair.
-George Burns
A committee is a
group that keeps minutes and loses
hours.
-Milton Berle
I don't
want any yes-men around me. I want everybody to tell me the truth, even if it
costs them their
jobs.
-Sam Goldwyn
Television is a medium
because it is neither rare nor well
done.
-Ernie Kovacs
When I bore
people at a party, they think it is their
fault.
-Henry Kissinger
"DAILY JEWISH WISDOM" is found @ Beliefnet.com
JEWISH WISDOM:
Fear builds walls to bar the light. - Baal Shem Tov
Engage in Torah and charity even with an ulterior motive, for that habit of right doing will lead also to right motivation. - Talmud: Pesahim, 50b
The sword comes into the world because of justice delayed and because of justice perverted.- Ethics of the Fathers 5:8
Ever since Rabbi Akiba used the Passover seder to plan a revolutionary struggle against the Roman occupiers, the Jews have used the seder to begin concrete work on tikkun (healing and transformation).
- Rabbi Michael Lerner, the Tikkun Magazine Passover supplement 2006
To work out ends of righteousness and love are you called; not merely to enjoy or suffer.
- S.R. Hirsch, "Nineteen Letters," 1836
“Pessimism is a luxury that a Jew can never allow himself.” Golda Meir
The worship of God, though desirable as an end itself, can somehow never be in the right spirit, unless it impels one to the service of man. - Rabbi Mordechai Kaplan
Concentrate on three things and you will not fall into the grip of sin. Know from where you came, where you are going, and before Whom you will have to give account and reckoning.- Pirkei Avot 3:1
We cannot learn from general principles: there may be exceptions. - Johanan, Talmud: Kiddushin
A truly generous man is he that always gives, whether it be much or little, before he is asked.- Orchot Tsadiqim
The best security for old age: respect your children.- Sholem Asch
A Jew can be Jewish with God, against God, but not without God.- Elie Wiesel
He who promotes his own honor at the expense of his neighbor's has no portion in the world to come.- Judah b. Hanina, Genesis Rabbah
Even if all the world tells you, "You are righteous," consider yourself a sinner. - Rabbi Simlai
Prayer is meaningless unless it is subversive, unless it seeks to overthrow and to ruin the pyramids of callousness, hatred, opportunism and falsehood. The liturgical movement must become a revolutionary movement, seeking to overthrow the forces that continue to destroy the promise, the hope, the vision.- Abraham Joshua Heschel, "On Prayer"
Lose with truth and right rather than gain with falsehood and wrong.- Maimonides, "Tzavaah"
Seek the good in everyone, and reveal it, bring it forth.- Rabbi Nachman of Breslov (1772-1811), "Likutey Moharan"
Just as we love ourselves despite the faults we know we have, so should we love our neighbors despite the faults we see in them.- Rabbi Israel Baal Shem Tov
A man should never impose an overpowering fear upon his household. - Babylonian Talmud, Gittin 6b
If you add to the truth, you subtract from it.- The Talmud
Love unaccompanied by criticism is not love....Peace unaccompanied by reproof is not peace.- Genesis Rabbah 54:3
Quote of the Day
Site Visits
Fair Use Act
FAIR USE NOTICE: Many of the articles on this site contain copyrighted material whose use has not been specifically authorized by the copyright owner. We are making this material available in its efforts to advance the understanding of different issues related to this site. We believe this constitutes a 'fair use' of the copyrighted material as provided for in Title 17 U.S.C. Section 107 of the US Copyright Law. If you wish to use such copyrighted material for purposes of your own that go beyond 'fair use' you must obtain permission from the copyright owner.
Folk Insights 5773
Aug 2013
According to Howard Ashland, linguistics professor at Brooklyn College and renowned Hebronics scholar, the sentence structure of Hebronics derives from middle and eastern European language patterns, as well as Yiddish.
Professor Shulman explains:
In Hebronics, the response to any question is usually another question with a complaint that is either implied or stated.
Thus 'How are you?' may be answered, 'How should I be, with my bad feet?' '
Shulman says that Hebronics is a superb linguistic vehicle for expressing sarcasm or scepticism. An example is the repetition of a word with 'sh' or 'shm' at the beginning: 'Mountains, shmountains. Stay away. You should want a nosebleed?'
Another Hebronics pattern is moving the subject of a sentence to the end, with its pronoun at the beginning: 'It's beautiful, that dress.'
Shulman says one also sees the Hebronics verb moved to the end of the sentence. Thus the response to a remark such as 'He's slow as a turtle,' could be: 'Turtle, shmurtle! Like a fly in Vaseline he walks.'
Shulman provided the following examples from his best-selling textbook, Switched-On Hebronics:
Question: 'What time is it?'
English answer: 'Sorry, I don't know.'
Hebronic response: 'What am I, a clock?'
Remark: 'I hope things turn out okay.'
English answer: 'Thanks.'
Hebronic response: 'I should be so lucky!'
Remark: 'Hurry up. Dinner's ready.'
English answer: 'Be right there.'
Hebronic response: 'Alright already, I'm coming.
What's with the 'hurry' business? Is there a fire?'
Remark: 'I like the tie you gave me; I wear it all the time.'
English answer: 'Glad you like it.'
Hebronic response: 'So what's the matter; you don't like the other ties I gave you?'
Remark: 'Sarah and I are engaged.'
English answer: 'Congratulations!'
Hebronic response: 'She could stand to lose a few pounds.'
Question: 'Would you like to go riding with us?'
English answer: 'Just say when.'
Hebronic response: 'Riding, shmiding! Do I look like a cowboy?'
To the guest of honor at a birthday party:
English answer: 'Happy birthday'
Hebronic response: 'A year smarter you should become.'
Remark: 'It's a beautiful day.'
English answer: 'Sure is.'
Hebronic response: 'So the sun is out; what else is new?'
Answering a phone call from a son:
English answer: 'It's been a while since you called.'
Hebronic response: 'You didn't wonder if I'm dead already?'
July, 2013
From Herb to the Rabbi: How was your trip? Now that your back will we get some stories again? I personally enjoyed them. Does our religion change with the times to co-exist or become a part to help? I don't know if I am asking this correctly. I've been reading a lot and have questions.
reply:May 29, 2013
Fran D. observes in response to the Shlach-Lecha commentary:
Bruce and I are both against the death penalty. Mom is for the death penalty and naturally thinks we are wrong. They had a vote about this a number of years ago in Florida. Bruce could give you his own reasons for his opinion. My reasons are two; life in prison is much worse a punishment and too many mistakes are made convicting innocent people and sending them to die.
Bruce says that there are a lot of sick minded murderers who actually want the high of getting put to death. They want the drama and a big show. There was actually a serial killer who moved to Florida to commit his crimes so he could feel the electric chair as the grand finale to his killing spree. So why give them what they want??
SHAVUOT DAIRY 5773 
The custom of dairy for Shavuot is known.
We waited until babes were sufficiently grown…
Can this be the reason we honor MOMS in the Spring
For our lives with their milk and the Love that they bring?
HAPPY PESACH!
Passover Embracing of Freedom 5773
Been through the long Lists and Rush of getting ready.
Still have loads of dishes and my feet to steady…
Yet the two Seders were and done as needed,
Although the lesson by all might not be heeded.
We tried. We were reminded to fight oppression,
To relish dear Freedoms and oppose suppression
Of equal rights for all to unabridged medical access,
To families’ benefits equalities, to success
In brokering Peace among all nations, to Dignity
Granted regardless of stations. Fidelity
To the Passover call: Embrace Freedom for All!
HAPPY PURIM!
Disguises, Purim 5773
Adele Jay
Gazing deeply into all sets of eyes,
Can we still see beyond each one’s disguise?
Disguise of vision, disguise of lies,
Disguise built high on diplomacies-
Disguise of purpose and what it buys:
Costumed, coifed, careful attempts to please-
Was Hadassah happy in her role
As wife to a finicky leader?
Did the family escape from death’s door
Reassure her that we’ll always need her?
We do. So too, as long as it can be done,
Against Amalek we will fight to heed her.
Feb. 11
It seems like since the shootings took place in Sandy Hook, the shooting of innocent people has gone off the charts! The two questions that keep going around in my mind are 1. Why? and 2. What is wrong with people? It doesn't make any sense. But, here's the major questions I would love to see answered: "What the hell are we waiting for?" "How many more have to die before we finally decide that it's time to do something? For us as a people to do something???" No one else will come around and do it for us!
Rut Naomi Avraham
"Look deep into Nature, and then you will understand everything better." Albert Einstein
For Tu B'Shvat: "We have not inherited the earth from our ancestors --- we have borrowed it from our children." - ancient proverb
Ken couldn't resist sharing these punnies... one of the cleanest forms of humor that could be...
How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.
Venison for dinner again? Oh deer!
A cartoonist was found dead in his home. Details are sketchy.
I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.
Haunted French pancakes give me the crępes.
England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool .
I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.
They told me I had type-A blood, but it was a Type-O.
I changed my iPod's name to Titanic. It's syncing now.
Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid, but he
says he can stop any time.
I stayed up all night to see where the sun went, and
then it dawned on me.
This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian
club, but I'd never met herbivore.
When chemists die, they barium.
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.
I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a
play on words.
PMS jokes aren't funny; period...
Why were the Indians here first? They had reservations.
We're going on a class trip to the Coca-Cola factory.
I hope there's no pop quiz.
I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.
Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who lost her
job because she couldn't control her pupils?
When you get a bladder infection. urine trouble.
Broken pencils are pointless.
What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive
vocabulary? A thesaurus.
I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx.
All the toilets in New York 's police stations have
been stolen. The police have nothing to go on.
I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.
Velcro - what a rip off!
"Do not worry about old age; it does not last"
*****************************************************
Oct. 2012 from JR on a humorous take on the Arab Boycott of Jewish institutions and Jews, Jewish vs Muslim achievements and the world's warping of the facts:
This is interesting.....the number of Jewish people that have discovered or invented in the medical field. It has been said, that if you are ill go to a hospital
Operated by the Jewish people.....they work day and night and 24/7. Some of the best Doctors and Nurses are Jewish.
Subject: A Jewish Boycott
From:
Iran's Supreme Leader Grand Ayatollah Ali Khomenei urged the Muslim World to boycott anything and everything that originated with the Jewish people.
In response, Meyer M. Treinkman, a pharmacist, out of the kindness of his heart, offered to assist them in their boycott as follows:
"Any Muslim who has Syphilis must not be cured by Salvarsan discovered by a Jew, Dr. Ehrlich. He should not even try to find out whether he has Syphilis, because the Wasserman Test is the discovery of a Jew. If a Muslim suspects that he has Gonorrhea, he must not seek diagnosis, because he will be using the method of a Jew named Neissner.
"A Muslim who has heart disease must not use Digitalis, a discovery by a Jew, Ludwig Traube.
Should he suffer with a toothache, he must not use Novocaine, a discovery of the Jews, Widal and Weil.
If a Muslim has Diabetes, he must not use Insulin, the result of research by Minkowsky, a Jew. If one has a headache, he must shun Pyramidon and Antypyrin, due to the Jews, Spiro and Ellege.
Muslims with convulsions must put up with them because it was a Jew, Oscar Leibreich, who proposed the use of Chloral Hydrate.
Arabs must do likewise with their psychic ailments because Freud, father of psychoanalysis, was a Jew.
Should a Muslim child get Diphtheria, he must refrain from the "Schick" reaction which was invented by the Jew, Bella Schick.
"Muslims should be ready to die in great numbers and must not permit treatment of ear and brain damage, work of Jewish Nobel Prize winner, Robert Baram.
They should continue to die or remain crippled by Infantile Paralysis because the discoverer of the anti-polio vaccine is a Jew, Jonas Salk.
"Muslims must refuse to use Streptomycin and continue to die of Tuberculosis because a Jew, Zalman Waxman, invented the wonder drug against this killing disease.
Muslim doctors must discard all discoveries and improvements by dermatologist Judas Sehn Benedict, or the lung specialist, Frawnkel, and of many other world renowned Jewish scientists and medical experts.
"In short, good and loyal Muslims properly and fittingly should remain afflicted with Syphilis, Gonorrhea, Heart Disease, Headaches, Typhus, Diabetes, Mental Disorders,
Polio Convulsions and Tuberculosis and be proud to obey the Islamic boycott."
Oh, and by the way, don't call for a doctor on your cell phone because the cell phone was invented in Israel by a Jewish engineer.
Meanwhile I ask, what medical contributions to the world have the Muslims made?"
The Global Islamic population is approximately 1,200,000,000; that is ONE BILLION TWO HUNDRED MILLION or 20% of the world's population.
They have received the following Nobel Prizes:
Literature:
1988 - Najib Mahfooz
Peace:
1978 - Mohamed Anwar El-Sadat
1990 - Elias James Corey
1994 - Yaser Arafat:
1999 - Ahmed Zewai
Economics:
(zero)
Physics:
(zero)
Medicine:
1960 - Peter Brian Medawar
1998 - Ferid Mourad
TOTAL: 7 SEVEN
. The Global Jewish population is approximately 14,000,000; that is FOURTEEN MILLION or about 0.02% of the world's population
They have received the following Nobel Prizes:
Literature:
1910 - Paul Heyse
1927 - Henri Bergson
1958 - Boris Pasternak
1966 - Shmuel Yosef Agnon
1966 - Nelly Sachs
1976 - Saul Bellow
1978 - Isaac Bashevis Singer
1981 - Elias Canetti
1987 - Joseph Brodsky
1991 - Nadine Gordimer World
Peace:
1911 - Alfred Fried
1911 - Tobias Michael Carel Asser
1968 - Rene Cassin
1973 - Henry Kissinger
1978 - Menachem Begin
1986 - Elie Wiesel
1994 - Shimon Peres
1994 - Yitzhak Rabin
Physics:
1905 - Adolph Von Baeyer
1906 - Henri Moissan
1907 - Albert Abraham Michelson
1908 - Gabriel Lippmann
1910 - Otto Wallach
1915 - Richard Willstaetter
1918 - Fritz Haber
1921 - Albert Einstein
1922 - Niels Bohr
1925 - James Franck
1925 - Gustav Hertz
1943 - Gustav Stern
1943 - George Charles de Hevesy
1944 - Isidor Issac Rabi
1952 - Felix Bloch
1954 - Max Born
1958 - Igor Tamm
1959 - Emilio Segre
1960 - Donald A. Glaser
1961 - Robert Hofstadter
1961 - Melvin Calvin
1962 - Lev Davidovich Landau
1962 - Max Ferdinand Perutz
1965 - Richard Phillips Feynman
1965 - Julian Schwinger
1969 - Murray Gell-Mann
1971 - Dennis Gabor
1972 - William Howard Stein
1973 - Brian David Josephson
1975 - Benjamin Mottleson
1976 - Burton Richter
1977 - Ilya Prigogine
1978 - Arno Allan Penzias
1978 - Peter L Kapitza
1979 - Stephen Weinberg
1979 - Sheldon Glashow
1979 - Herbert Charles Brown
1980 - Paul Berg
1980 - Walter Gilbert
1981 - Roald Hoffmann
1982 - Aaron Klug
1985 - Albert A. Hauptman
1985 - Jerome Karle
1986 - Dudley R. Herschbach
1988 - Robert Huber
1988 - Leon Lederman
1988 - Melvin Schwartz
1988 - Jack Steinberger
1989 - Sidney Altman
1990 - Jerome Friedman
1992 - Rudolph Marcus
1995 - Martin Perl
2000 - Alan J. Heeger
Economics:
1970 - Paul Anthony Samuelson
1971 - Simon Kuznets
1972 - Kenneth Joseph Arrow
1975 - Leonid Kantorovich
1976 - Milton Friedman
1978 - Herbert A. Simon
1980 - Lawrence Robert Klein
1985 - Franco Modigliani
1987 - Robert M. Solow
1990 - Harry Markowitz
1990 - Merton Miller
1992 - Gary Becker
1993 - Robert Fogel
Medicine:
1908 - Elie Metchnikoff
1908 - Paul Erlich
1914 - Robert Barany
1922 - Otto Meyerhof
1930 - Karl Landsteiner
1931 - Otto Warburg
1936 - Otto Loewi
1944 - Joseph Erlanger
1944 - Herbert Spencer Gasser
1945 - Ernst Boris Chain
1946 - Hermann Joseph Muller
1950 - Tadeus Reichstein
1952 - Selman Abraham Waksman
1953 - Hans Krebs
1953 - Fritz Albert Lipmann
1958 - Joshua Lederberg
1959 - Arthur Kornberg
1964 - Konrad Bloch
1965 - Francois Jacob
1965 - Andre Lwoff
1967 - George Wald
1968 - Marshall W. Nirenberg
1969 - Salvador Luria
1970 - Julius Axelrod
1970 - Sir Bernard Katz
1972 - Gerald Maurice Edelman
1975 - Howard Martin Temin
1976 - Baruch S. Blumberg
1977 - Roselyn Sussman Yalow
1978 - Daniel Nathans
1980 - Baruj Benacerraf
1984 - Cesar Milstein
1985 - Michael Stuart Brown
1985 - Joseph L. Goldstein
1986 - Stanley Cohen [& Rita Levi-Montalcini]
1988 - Gertrude Elion
1989 - Harold Varmus
1991 - Erwin Neher
1991 - Bert Sakmann
1993 - Richard J. Roberts
1993 - Phillip Sharp
1994 - Alfred Gilman
1995 - Edward B. Lewis
1996- Lu RoseIacovino
TOTAL: 129!
The Jews are NOT promoting brainwashing children in military training camps, teaching them how to blow themselves up and cause maximum deaths of Jews and other non-Muslims.
The Jews don't hijack planes, nor kill athletes at the Olympics, or blow themselves up in German restaurants.
There is NOT one single Jew who has destroyed a church.
There is NOT a single Jew who protests by killing people. The Jews don't traffic slaves, nor have leaders calling for Jihad and death to all the Infidels.
Perhaps the world's Muslims should consider investing more in standard education and less in blaming the Jews for all their problems.
Muslims must ask 'what can they do for humankind' before they demand that humankind respects them.
Regardless of your feelings about the crisis between Israel and the Palestinians and Arab neighbors, even if you believe there is more culpability on Israel 's part, the following two sentences really say it all:
'If the Arabs put down their weapons today, there would be no more violence. If the Jews put down their weapons today, there would be no more Israel."
Benjamin Netanyahu: General Eisenhower warned us. It is a matter of history that when the Supreme Commander of the Allied Forces, General Dwight Eisenhower, found the victims of the death camps he ordered all possible photographs to be taken, and for the German people from surrounding villages to be ushered through the camps and even made to bury the dead.
He did this because he said in words to this effect: 'Get it all on record now - get the films - get the witnesses - because somewhere down the road of history some bastard will get up and say that this never happened'
Recently, the UK debated whether to remove The Holocaust from its school curriculum because it 'offends' the Muslim population which claims it never occurred.
It is not removed as yet. However, this is a frightening portent of the fear that is gripping the world and how easily each country is giving into it.
It is now more than 65 years after the Second World War in Europe ended.
Now, more than ever, with Iran, among others, claiming the Holocaust to be 'a myth,' it is imperative to make sure the world never forgets.
This e-mail is intended to reach 400 million people. Be a link in the memorial chain and help distribute this around the world.
How many years will it be before the attack on the World Trade Center 'NEVER HAPPENED' because it offends some Muslim in the United States? It is HAPPENING ALREADY!!
